How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting: A Mother's Heart
Becoming a mother is the most joyous and unconditional, and indescribable feeling ever. Motherhood is full of moments that pull at your heart.
The love that you feel for your child is unconditional because they are a part of you. You love your child deeply, yet sometimes the exhaustion, the overwhelm, and the feeling of not being heard bubble over until you find yourself raising your voice, even when you don't want to.
This tends to hurt you more than it hurts their feelings. You try to keep a stern face and then when all is well, you go in your secret place…the bathroom. The only place that is sacred enough for you to be alone for 10 minutes or so before the cavalry comes to find you.
There is where you do it. Yes, you let it out. You cry, sob, sniff all at the same time, but quietly.
You didn’t want to raise your voice. They just won’t listen and it hurt you so so bad to you heart to raise your voice.
You ask yourself, "How can I stop yelling when my child just won't listen?" — know this: you're not alone, and there's hope.
The fact that you want to stop yelling does not make you a bad mom. It makes you a gorgeous aware mom who is striving toward a higher way. And the reality is, when we yell, it's not because we're mean. It's because we're frazzled, not being heard ourselves, or longing for connection desperately.
This month is our month. Something that I have been doing since the beginning of 2025 is protecting my peace.
Let’s do this together and let this month be our time to focus on peace over power.
First, Here is a small prayer for you Mom
A Prayer for Mom
Every morning, pray:
"Lord, help me be the safe place my child runs to, not the storm he hides from."
You are already wrapped in grace, Mama. Every moment you pause, breathe, connect, and try again is a victory.
Your child — and your heart — are growing together.
5 Ways to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting
1. Stop Your Body First
As frustration arises, don't speak hastily. Stop your body: keep your hands still, release your shoulders, and breathe into the ground.
Whisper this prayer in your heart: "Holy Spirit, help me respond with peace, not power."
This small shift tells your nervous system that you are okay. You don't have to fight to be heard.
2. Connect Before You Correct
Before giving commands, slow down and bond. Drop down to your child's level. Gently place your hand on their shoulder or take their hand. Say, "Hey buddy, I really need your ears right now."
Kids listen best when they first feel heard, safe, and loved.
3. Use a Firm but Calm Tone
Yelling has a tendency to zone out children, whereas a lowered, stern tone makes them lean in.
You can quietly say, "This is important. Listen carefully." Lower your voice instead of raising it. It not only gains attention but also keeps your own heart peaceful.
4. Establish Clear, Compassionate Consequences
Instead of going on and on and on until frustration erupts, set a quiet boundary:
"You have until I count to 5 to put your shoes on. If not, I'll put them on for you, and it may not be how you like."
Follow up with kindness, not anger. Boundaries can be firm and loving.
5. Forgive Yourself Quickly
You will not be perfect — that's alright. If you shout, pause, take a breath, and model humility:
"Mommy got upset. I'm sorry. Let's try again together."
This teaches your child emotional control even more than never losing your temper would.
A Prayer for June
Every morning, pray:
"Lord, help me be the safe place my child runs to, not the storm he hides from."
You are already wrapped in grace, Mama. Every moment you pause, breathe, connect, and try again is a victory.
Your child — and your heart — are growing together. 🌿
If you’ve ever worried you’re not “doing enough,” that your ADHD brain is too scattered, or that you’re falling behind as a mama, listen close—because I’ve lived that fear.
But here’s what I’ve learned:
Mindfulness doesn’t mean perfection.
It means presence.
It means grace.
It means choosing to bloom into your God-given self—even when the process is messy.
That’s why I created Brain Bloom Bootcamp—a slide-based, soul-sparking journey for folks with ADHD brains who are ready to:
🧠 Embrace how they’re wired
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“Mind like whoa... that’s ME.”
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Use code: BLOOM75 at checkout.
Because your peace is sacred, and you don’t need to earn rest. You just need to receive it.
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Being Everything, Everywhere, All At Once: ADHD and New Motherhood
You recognize that shot in all the motherhood montages of laundry scattered all over, the dinner burning on the stove, the phone constantly ringing, and the baby bawling? Picture that.
But your head is trying to open all the tabs at the same time—new motherhood with ADHD.
ADHD does not magically disappear when we have a baby.
In fact, it goes into hyperdrive.
The sudden removal of routine, the constant demands, the lack of sleep—it can all be fuel on an already burning five-way brain.
For many moms with ADHD, the postpartum experience is a whirlwind of overstimulation, guilt, and self-doubt.
You may catch yourself sobbing because you forgot the diaper bag for the umpteenth time, yelling at your partner because the pacifier was misplaced, or freezing in place because your mind just ceased functioning.
It's not laziness.
It's not incompetence.
It's executive dysfunction, sensory overload, and hormonal shifts hitting all at once.
And guess what? You're not alone.
Most mothers aren't aware they have ADHD until after their baby is born.
School and work tend to camouflage symptoms—but motherhood lays them bare.
It exposes your coping mechanisms, challenges your routines, and pushes you into survival mode.
So, how do you manage?
Here are a few truths from the trenches:
Routine is your ally. Even a loose rhythm can anchor your day.
Lower the bar. Done is better than perfect. Your baby doesn’t care if the bottles are color-coordinated.
Outsource and delegate. No shame in asking for help or using delivery services.
Use your tools. Timers, sticky notes, whiteboards—whatever helps offload mental clutter.
Honor your rest. Sleep deprivation magnifies ADHD symptoms. Nap when you can.
Mothering is tough.
ADHD does not make it any easier.
But you are doing something wonderful—and messy and beautiful.
You're raising an individual while wending your way through a neurodivergent brain.
Are you an ADHA mom?
What was your biggest challenge in the first few weeks?
How did you manage—or what would you have said to yourself sooner?
Mother’s Day Reflections: Embracing the Chaos and Joy of Motherhood with ADHD
Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers, caregivers, guardians, foster mothers, adoptive mothers, grandmothers, and teachers who look after hundreds of children as their own each year.
With Mother's Day today, I sit here pondering the beautiful chaos that comprises my life. Being a mother with ADHD is a life of one-of-a-kind challenges and surprises of delight.
I homeschool my children, work the night shift as a postpartum doula, and operate both an online and bringing our reselling business back to life after my husband’s detrimental accident last year.
It's a life that calls for flexibility, determination, and a sense of humor.
The Dance of Homeschooling with ADHD
Homeschooling with ADHD is like playing an orchestra where each instrument has its own mind. Some days it's beautiful; other days it's a distraction symphony. I've learned that rules are necessary, but so is flexibility. We have a routine, but it's more of a plan than a schedule. If a lesson isn't going well, we change gears. If the sun is shining too brightly to be ignored, we go outside and learn.
Visuals are my favorite things. Bulletin boards, colored charts, and checklists remind us to stay on track. I also use alarms and reminders to help us make it through topic transitions. These are not just for my children—they're for me as well.
Night Shifts and the Art of Adaptation
Working at night as a postpartum doula is another aspect of my already complicated existence. Helping new mothers navigate their most vulnerable moments is immeasurably fulfilling, yet it means my sleep cycle is irregular. I sleep when possible and survive on caffeine and sheer willpower.
This nightlife style requires organization. I precook meals in advance, set study materials out in advance, and talk frankly to my family members about our unique timetable. We're in it together, and I appreciate that they accommodate my schedule.
Building and Rebuilding: The Entrepreneurial Spirit
It's both exciting and exhausting to have an online business and revive my reselling business. ADHD gives rise to a torrent of ideas and the urge for creativity but renders it challenging to concentrate and stay organized.
I've learned to utilize a hyperfocus period for productive time and forgive myself during distraction periods. I organize projects through task management tools to remain on top of tasks and create realistic goals so that I do not end up being burned out. Small successes remind me to remain encouraged and also understand the progress achieved.
The Power of Nature and Daily Grounding
Amidst the turmoil, nature is where I get my sanity. Every day, I spend a minute to step outside, get the grass between my toes, and inhale deeply. It is this little act that grounds me, allowing me to get a moment of peace and concentration. It's a reminder every day that, despite the chaos, there is beauty and peace to be found.
These little doses of the great outdoors aren't just a corrective thing—necessities. They get me back to me and facilitate the emotional grounding required to care for my loved ones and pursue my vocation.
Embracing the Journey with Love and Laughter
Motherhood with ADHD is a journey of self-discovery, resilience, and unshakeable love. It's learning to love the imperfections, finding beauty in small moments, and laughing through the chaos. I've learned to be compassionate with myself, to seek help when needed, and to honor the unique gifts that ADHD brings to my life.
This Mother's Day, I honor all mothers on their individual paths. Your creativity, resilience, and love are the threads that sewn together make up the beautiful tapestry of your family's story.
🌸 Celebrate Mother's Day with Empowering Resources 🌸
In honor of Mother's Day, I'm excited to offer two resources designed to support and empower mothers like you:
Brain Bloom Bootcamp: A comprehensive program tailored for mothers managing ADHD, homeschooling, and entrepreneurial pursuits. Join now and receive a special 50% discount during our Mother's Day presale! (Send “Bloom” to chatterbrainmommy@gmail.com)
eBook – Focus, Energize, and Thrive: Discover practical strategies to enhance focus, boost energy, and thrive in your multifaceted life. Available now on Amazon: Focus, Energize, and Thrive
Step into these tools to feed your well-being and keep on your journey with confidence and joy.
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