Being Everything, Everywhere, All At Once: ADHD and New Motherhood
You recognize that shot in all the motherhood montages of laundry scattered all over, the dinner burning on the stove, the phone constantly ringing, and the baby bawling? Picture that.
But your head is trying to open all the tabs at the same time—new motherhood with ADHD.
ADHD does not magically disappear when we have a baby.
In fact, it goes into hyperdrive.
The sudden removal of routine, the constant demands, the lack of sleep—it can all be fuel on an already burning five-way brain.
For many moms with ADHD, the postpartum experience is a whirlwind of overstimulation, guilt, and self-doubt.
You may catch yourself sobbing because you forgot the diaper bag for the umpteenth time, yelling at your partner because the pacifier was misplaced, or freezing in place because your mind just ceased functioning.
It's not laziness.
It's not incompetence.
It's executive dysfunction, sensory overload, and hormonal shifts hitting all at once.
And guess what? You're not alone.
Most mothers aren't aware they have ADHD until after their baby is born.
School and work tend to camouflage symptoms—but motherhood lays them bare.
It exposes your coping mechanisms, challenges your routines, and pushes you into survival mode.
So, how do you manage?
Here are a few truths from the trenches:
Routine is your ally. Even a loose rhythm can anchor your day.
Lower the bar. Done is better than perfect. Your baby doesn’t care if the bottles are color-coordinated.
Outsource and delegate. No shame in asking for help or using delivery services.
Use your tools. Timers, sticky notes, whiteboards—whatever helps offload mental clutter.
Honor your rest. Sleep deprivation magnifies ADHD symptoms. Nap when you can.
Mothering is tough.
ADHD does not make it any easier.
But you are doing something wonderful—and messy and beautiful.
You're raising an individual while wending your way through a neurodivergent brain.
Are you an ADHA mom?
What was your biggest challenge in the first few weeks?
How did you manage—or what would you have said to yourself sooner?
My Birthday Reflection on Growth with ADHD
Today is my birthday. And honestly, most birthdays once used to have a tinge of bitterness for me. There was always this undertone of sadness underlying the celebrations, because my mom isn't with me anymore.
Not being able to celebrate this day with her, not getting to hear her voice or catch her hug, left an aching gap which felt hard to fill.
A photo of my beautiful Momma, Dorothy W. Jones, on the right and my, her twin, Netta on the left. This is one of my favorite photos that I will always cherish♥️♥️♥️
But somewhere along the way, I've grown to accept that grief and temper it into something different—into joy, into gratitude, into living my life in her honor.
And today, I am complete. I am at peace. I am at ease. I am ready—with open arms—to welcome whatever God has in store for me.
Reflecting on 42: A Year of Miracles
Looking back over this past year of my life—age 42—I can see how far I've come.
I have accomplished more in one year than I ever could have imagined, and honestly, more than many get to accomplish in a whole lifetime. And I don't say this triumphantly—I say it gratefully.
New Callings and Creative Courage
I began a new profession (my 4th and final career) as a birth and postpartum doula, stepping in intentionally and working with families through some of their most sacred moments.
I launched two publications on Substack, Vent to Victory, where I turn vents of day-to-day life as an ADHDer, mom, wife, and Black woman in America into a victory. The main publication is ADHDventures in Homeschooling, where I talk about the life of homeschooling as a mommy with ADHD, the goods, the chaos, and gratitude.
I began a blog, a podcast (Chatterbrain Mommy), and an e-book that is deeply personal and emotional to my journey.
Connections That Became Chosen Family
With all that, I've encountered some of the sweetest souls—those who've not only advised me but who now are friends, sisters, and chosen family.
They've invested in me just as I've learned to invest in others.
The Radical Shift: Choosing Myself First
But perhaps the most revolutionary of this journey? I've learned to put myself first.
As someone with ADHD, that hasn't always been intuitive. We get pulled in by the hustle, by the whirl of overthinking and overstimulation, constantly chasing after the next thing or trying to "catch up."
But this year, I took my foot off the gas.
I learned to sleep without guilt.
I embraced quiet.
I re-established my spirituality, deepening my connection with God in a way that keeps me centered no matter what's going on around me.
I began to turn about the old habits and replacing them with intentional routines. I found joy within myself. I stopped waiting for peace and instead learned how to create it.
A photo of me as I embrace the beautiful bloom of many flowers, meaning many opportunities arise as I walk in my purpose.
A photo of me as I am so joyful. These flowers were given to me by my baby daughter on my 21st anniversary on 4/13/2025.
Walking Boldly in My Purpose
That's why I'm still strutting my stuff confidently in my ministry as an ADHD life and wellness coach. In spite of the bumps, in spite of the doubt, I know this is what I am called to do.
My coaching website will be live in a few weeks, and I'm already taking pre-appointments.
I've had single-session work that has reminded me how desperately this work is needed—and I'm just so blessed to be creating a successful business where I can come fully, not only for my clients, but for my family as well.
Welcoming 43: A Year for Blooming
This year, 43 is going to be about growth and establishment. Last year was establishing—putting the foundation down. This year is about watering the seeds that I planted last year and watching them bloom.
So stay tuned. God’s not done. I’m walking in my purpose, with love in my heart, and fire in my spirit—and I’m ready to help others do the same.
